Self-Esteem Activity I
Spend a week teaching your child "Everything About Me." Discuss with him about his strong points, what he wants to be, his likes, dislikes, hobbies etc.
· Make an " Everything About Me " poster. At the centre of the poster, paste the Child's photograph.
· On the upper left hand corner let your child add a brief paragraph about who he is, what he feels is best about him.
· The mission is to cut images out of magazines that best exemplify who he is.
· He may add pictures of his favorite hobbies, interests and whatever makes him special.
· Once it is ready, put it on the child’s cupboard or in his room, where child can see it again and again.
Self-Esteem Activity II:
Give one diary or notebook to the child. Tell him to write about his two (minimum) achievements of the day and two (minimum) things that someone did for him which made him very happy. Encourage him do this exercise everyday before going off to sleep.
Self- Esteem Activity-III
When child get up in the morning, tell them to stand in front of the mirror, look into their own eyes and talk about some good things about themselves. Or simply they can say, “It’s bright happy day and….( which ever is right for the child from following)
- I am an achiever
- I have the power to make right choices
- I am commited to my goals
- I have excellent communication skills
- I have confidence to do all the things
- I possess enthusiasm.
- I possess excellence in all that I do.
- Make them part of decision making in home in appropriate situation.
- Share with them your experiences, your life.
- Make them feel part of everything happenimg in family.
- Make them realise that even when you are parents, you are humans and can make mistakes.
COMMUNICATING WITH CHILDREN
We can divide communication in four categories.
1. Direct but Unclear- e.g. “You think you are perfect?” or “You never care for others”. Here message ‘put down’ other and leads to further coflict. Person receiving it either withdraws or attack back.
2. Indirect but Clear- e.g. “Nobody does anything around here”. Message is clear but not directed at anyone or anything specific. Person sending it is trying to protect himself from humiliation or rejection or hurt etc.
3. Indirect and Unclear- e.g. “Is everybody blind here?” or “Am I talking to a wall?”. This type of communicationblocks the self worth of person receiving and immediately breakdowns communication.
4. Direct and Clear- This type of communication express what you need and how you feel.
Children observe their parents and pick up similar manner of communication. Children need to be encouraged to express themselves clearly and directly. If they are using any other way, that means they are feeling threatened by the expected resonse of elders. To protect themselves from criticism or rejection, they use protective means of expression. It is important that it is noticed and immediate corrective action is taken. Parents need to think about their own earlier responses or their way of communicating with others.
Children have many needs and they depend upon elders for the fulfillment of their needs. They should learn to talk about their needs openly and clearly. But when these needs are not met repeatedly without any explanation, they start feeling doubtful about appropriteness of their needs and start loosing confidence. So, it is also important that children are made to respond positively to the reasonable requests of parents and other elders. Children tend to believe that the world rotates around them, when clearly it does not; still they prefer to think so. Parents must talk to them and children should be helped to know that they are not the only ones with needs in the family and each and every person’s reasonable demands and needs are accepted and responded to when possible.
Children should be encouraged to talk clearly. If child’s demand or need is unjustified or not appropriate (according to parents), then instead of ignoring or ridiculing it, try to find out the reason behind the demand and explain to him why it cannot be met- very clearly and directly. Do not promise them something that is not possible.